JJ: Who's the Boss?

I have a friend, Ned, who for years has called everyone “Boss.” Says it all the time. “How ya doing, boss? Move over, boss. Want another drink, boss? Who’s the boss, apple sauce?” Last weekend Ned had the celebrity stalker sighting of a lifetime when he bumped into and exchanged hellos with Bruce "the Boss" Springsteen as they each waited in line to pick up tickets at the New York Yankees’ spring training ballpark in Tampa. “Did you say, “hey Boss,” was my obvious question. The phone went silent. “Damn it!”

Next week I’m meeting Ned in Limerick, Ireland, and a few of us are touring the country. So in the spirit of our trip:

There once was a Ned from Nantucket,
Who called everyone "Boss" while leaving his dignity in a bucket,
But when he saw the real deal, a Springsteen named Bruce,
Choked up like a dude with something to lose,
As for not calling him "Boss" or even "apple sauce,"
Well, f--- it.

- John