Mmm...Puffy Penguin Omelets

I believe that "The Penguin," John Bingham, has been writing a Runner's World column for at least 6-7 years. I don't know exactly when he started, and being in touch with my "inner penguin" empowers me to not break a sweat trying too hard to be accurate. He may even have submitted the same column 84 times—it seems that way but I can't be sure. Anyway, after all these years, The Penguin has waddled across an amazingly insightful revelation — possibly even an epiphany. From his latest column:

"I now see that it is possible to increase your speed or increase your distance without losing sight of the essential pleasure of running."

Ponder that, peeps. It's a whole new world. Waddle on.