A Big Lance Friday

There's nothing cool about drunken riding.

An investigative report released Wednesday may have cleared Lance Armstrong of accusations that he used EPO during the 1999 Tour, but Chicago Sun-Times columnist Rick Telander isn't ready to declare him innocent. "We the fans know what we see, and when we see muscles from another planet and endurance beyond belief, we know something is happening."

Associated Press columnist Jim Litke counters that Lance was the most frequently tested athlete on the planet "and he's never come back with a positive, confirmed result even once, or trotted out the excuse he didn't know what he was putting into his body."

The San Francisco Chronicle's C.W. Nevius compares the differences between Lance Armstrong and Barry Bonds. "Is it the premise of the French that Armstrong somehow managed to get the only sample of a wonder drug that allowed him to win the Tour seven times?"

Bryan Burwell of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch only wishes he knew more about cycling and that Americans cared about the story so he could formulate an opinion. "[Lance] gets a free pass because his sport hardly registers on this country's sports landscape." Ah, but all the world's a stage, Bryan.

A Men's Journal article reports Lance "hated racing" in the last few years but likes his vino (legal drug) now. "For 20 years I lived like a monk, but now if you open a bottle of red, I'll be the first one at the table," he said.